That moment in your life you realize your life is never going to be the same.
The first glimpse of that little blue plus sign on that stick you just peed all over. The thoughts running through my head “Are You Fucking Kidding me?” Actually I believe those were the actual words that came out of my mouth! It’s not real, get me another pregnancy test. It’s WRONG! Five pregnancy tests later I started to think, well, I guess they can’t all be false positives. What do I do? Who do I tell? The way I found out I was pregnant could have been in a movie scene.
I wasn’t even late. I still had two days until I was suppose to start my period. My boobs were hurting though and that is pretty common for me before my monthly visitor, so I didn’t think much about it. I was more bothered at my irritability and how much of a HUGE bitch I was being to my best friend.
She was heading over to my place because we had a girls night planned at another friends house; Wine, Fajitas, and Cards Against Humanity. I apologized for being so mean to her recently. Not sure what’s gotten into me, and told her I’m about to start my period thats why I am so cranky.
Fast Forward a Few Hours
Myself and four of my friends are all sitting around the kitchen table. Laughing and sippin on some fine wine, okay not that fine, but we weren’t drinking box wine and went for the $13 bottles instead of the usual $9.99 bottle thats twice as big. CLASSY I know. Anyways, we had a pretty good buzz going on and I had to pee. I left the table and on my way back to the kitchen I was ran down the stairs. “God my boobs hurt!” I blurted out. The girls asked why, I said I think I’m about to start. You know how that convo goes.
“I have a pregnancy test. Want to take it for shits & giggles?” said my girlfriend whose house we were at.
Something inside me was like no, nope. Im really planning on drinking the rest of that bottle of wine. Instead, we all ran up to the bathroom. Five girls stuffed in the tiny bathroom, buzzed and laughing as I peed on the stick.
I passed the test back to my friend to set on the counter. Everyone was talking and laughing, and then…SILENCE. Complete silence and wide eyes around the room.
“What? What does it say?” I yanked my pants up and looked down at the test.
Positive.
I started bawling my eyes out, chugged the quarter of a glass of wine I had left, and walked out of the room. The rest of the night was tears, and stories my friends shared about their pregnancies. They told me I had their support. That was very reassuring. I called my mom and of course she was ecstatic. (This is her first grand baby) She calms me down and tells me everything is okay. Everything will be okay always.
I barely sleep that night…next step, tell Daddy. Not my daddy, the babies daddy.
I’ve grown so much through all of this, and it has me stepping my game up for sure. I went from late 20’s, party girl, kind of barely got my shit together with no for sure plans for my future, to a nesting, knitting, doula, mommy to be.
This is what I needed in my life.
This is the next step, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. By the way Daddy and I are happily enjoying our lives together. I truly believe everything happens for a reason.
No one has to be alone during any of this. Even if the babies daddy isn’t in the picture. That does not mean you can’t do this! You got this girl! Every woman situation is different. Find your woman tribe, your support. There is always someone out there who would love and want to be there for you. Babies are little blessings and someone out there wants to be a part of that with you.
What about you mama’s, how did you find out you were pregnant?
To also read the story of my baby’s natural birth in the hospital click HERE.
